Thursday 2 July 2015

A Lightbulb Moment....

My youngest Ellie is 7 and it's come to a point now where her behavior is so bad that I dread the afternoon school run and getting told by her teacher what she has done...

This blog post was going to just get my thoughts down about Ellie's bad behavior but as I have gone back to link old posts into this one I have realised the behavior happens at this time every year from about may onwards!! 


See blogging is useful....I wouldn't have known this if I hadn't have blogged about it....hehehe

In 2013 when Ellie was in Year 1 (she was 5 years old) and started wetting herself more than she should....She was dry through the night but during the day she would go into a daydream and have accidents....At least 5 times a day if not more so we went to the doctors and she was given tablets to help control her bladder.....They worked for a while but it was a short term solution....She was taken off the tablets and did well for about a year....She would still have the odd accident but nothing compared to what she was....

Towards the end of Year 2 at school she went through a fascination with messing about in the toilets....After the previous year and her wetting herself they couldn't stop her going to the toilet....Her teacher at the time Miss L was the meekest and so softly spoken but Ellie broke her and made her shout....So much so that a child in the class cried because they weren't used to it....Ellie had detentions, plenty of red cards and a few tellings off from the headteacher....

Now we are coming to the end of Year 3 and for the last couple of months Ellie's behavior has been terrible....At school she has refused to do work. For example 3 sentences in 45 minutes is not good enough.....She was kept in at lunchtime and she managed a full page of work in about 20 minutes....She was told off for the lack of work one day and 10 minutes later wet herself and smugly told her teacher that she couldn't do anymore work as she had to go and get changed. The little madam....She's been put on a behavior book which has stopped working now....She's back to day dreaming, has been kept in at playtime and had more tellings off from the headteacher....It got to the point where the school referred her to the people at the hospital who deal with children's behavior....We're still waiting for an appointment as there is a huge waiting list....It could be months....

Tonight she has a detention after school for not doing her homework....She point blank refused to do it....There is only so many times I can ask her to do it.....I would rather her have a detention and do it at school than cause all the stress at home as at home her behavior isn't as bad here.....She has her moments but she is a different girl at home than she is at school....

I am going to mention that it seems to happen over the last term before the summer holidays to Ellie's teacher and see what she says....It's not on and we can't go on like this every year but if it is this at least we know what to expect....

I am counting down the days to the summer holidays....After today we have 11 days to go.....I can't wait!!

18 comments :

  1. I wonder if it is something to do with routine. Schools tend to wind down and have lots of activities going on at the end of term which are not part of the normal schedule. If a child likes routine they can find this upsetting and it could be a way to try to cope. Keep pushing for an appointment, it took ages for us but we got there in the end and it was worth it. My son was diagnosed with autism and adhd, but with a new school and tablets he is like a different child. Much happier and you would never know. Hopefully it is nothing like this but you know your child the best so go with your instinct. Hope you get it all sorted

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    1. I think you may be right and it all down to the change in the routine....I will keep pushing for the appointment though. I'm glad things worked out OK for you and your son....
      Thank you! x

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  2. Oh hun, sounds like she's having a tough time. Perhaps it could be to do with stress about moving into the next school year? Some children really struggle and perhaps it is her way of showing how she feels about it. Talking to her about her behaviour in a way that is not "You need to stop doing..." but more "why are you doing.." or "Is there something that's bothering you?" could help? I'm not trying to be an expert or anything just trying to offer advice. My two often act out towards the end of the year but when I tell them that it hurts other people's feelings or make them understand what they're doing it settles down again. It is difficult and I hope you find a way to understand. Good luck hun. xx

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    1. Thank you Morgan.....I appreciate your advice....
      She is quite excited about moving up a year so I don't think it's that....but it could be.
      We have asked her why she is being the way she is and she says she just doesn't want to do the work or she says she doesn't know.....It is hard but I'm just counting down the days.

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  3. This term is a long one each year and it is very tiring for everyone. Maybe that is affecting her? My son never does his homework either but his school aren't too bothered when it gets to this time of year. Has she been having some early nights? My children misbehave if they are doing to much so we stop and spend some time relaxing and doing very little for a while. I hope that you find some answers soon. If it is happening at the same time each year, hopefully you will be able to find out why.

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    1. She has had a few early nights but this last week she has been going to sleep at about 10pm as it's been so warm. I don't think the sleep is to blame....Even when she has been getting 12 hours she acts the same.
      I am starting to think it's just the excitement of the summer holidays. Thank you x

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  4. How interesting that you've noticed a pattern going on. I agree with the previous comment about the winding for summer holidays and the kids do get really excitable this time of year any way. My kids always play up when it's hot as well even my 9 year old had a full toddler tantrum in the school car park and that's not like her at all. Does her behaviour improve once your on summer holidays? My sons 5 tomorrow and still wets him self most days because he's kinda lazy and can't be bothered to walk to the toilet. That's in his own words too! Roll on the summer hols not long now x

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    1. Yes her behavior has always been OK during the holidays....Well as OK as a 7 year old gets. hehehe
      That is exactly what my girl used to say about going to the toilet or that she was too busy playing...

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  5. I have a grandson just the same and its usually a case of they've stopped teaching for the year and are busy trying to push the last stragglers up to the required level. Also some kids don't get quality sleep in this period of the year, they may be in that bed , but often they're laid there waiting to get up from 4 in the morning, not a lot of cure for that one , it's just some people are like that , in a winter you struggle to wake them.

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    1. I feel less alone in the situation now. Thank you!

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  6. Is it the stress of moving up a class? Do they shuffle the children, so she won't have her friends move up with her? If you've noticed a pattern, definitely worth looking into it. x

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    1. I don't think it is....She is quite excited about it. She has been with the same children since nursery and they all stay together right until they leave to go to secondary school. It's a small school.

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  7. Oh bless you - and her. How stressful for everyone. There definitely seems to be something with this time of year. I hope you find some answers. Kaz x

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    1. It has been stressful....I'm just counting down the days until the holidays! Thank you x

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  8. Hmm this is really interesting - it could be a whole host of things, change in routine, change in school year coming up and the summer holidays excitement of course. I know a lot of people feel down and exhausted during the winter, could this maybe be something along the lines of that? (but a reverse?) I hope you don't have to wait too long for an appointment.

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    1. I think it could just be excitement....Thank you x

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  9. Oh hun! As the commenters above say, it could be so many things but I can't even begin to imagine how stressful it is for you all at the moment x

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  10. I bet once the summer holidays start you will want school back... I am always getting cought in wishes like this

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